A Lazy Sunday Read

Once Upon a Time- Part 3

2009-12-08T23:39:00.000-08:00

Malvika walked out of the cafe, dazed and mumbling. This very morning she had started out to meet an old friend of hers and was bubbling with excitement. This very moment, she seemed lost and given a reality check. Even the rains which she was fond of seemed dreary and tiresome now.

As she climbed into the bus heading home, she got lost in her thoughts. She had walked into the cafe an hour ago excited to meet the vibrant best friend she knew. Instead, she met another woman, one who had matured beyond her years, one whose bright demeanour had been replaced with a classy calm. The one thing which she was glad hadn't changed was that despite the classy calm, Vidhya retained the naturally warm vibe which was and is uniquely hers. Her very presence still comforted Malvika. She couldn't help but feel belittled when she thought of the genuineness in Vidhya's voice and eyes. She didnt get to see it often around her any more. However, Vidhya's outright statement came as a shock. Malvika still felt that there was no harm done. "Looks like I was wrong." mumbled Malvika to herself. At the same time Malvika was surprised to note that Vidhya had managed to retain her childlike sensitivity and fierce sense of ethics despite being in the center of the rat race. All it took was 45 minutes to get that straight.

Just as Malvika's bus screeched to a halt, Malvika decided that no matter what, she will try to get back and hold on to Vidhya as her best friend.

Once Upon a Time- Part 2

2009-08-29T04:15:00.000-07:00

She stirred the tea again lost in thought.

She hadnt thought it possible for them to be separated,let alone separated the way they had. Definitely not this reason.

It was something very workable Vidhya had thought then. The issue was relatively simple. It was on one of those lazy afternoons after a heavy lunch of macaroni and ice cream at Malvika's place. They were researching for their project when an IM window pops up revealing Malvika to be in a relationship without Vidhya ever hearing about it. Once Vidhya recovered from the initial shock, she had questioned Malvika about it. It had taken time for her to accept that Malvika was in a relationship, a cyber one at that without so much of a mention to her but she quickly convinced herself that she had taken things much too seriously and it was finally Malvika's life and she had every right to make a decision about it. She was her friend, her best friend. She would stick by and try her best to ensure Malvika's happy.

That incident wasnt quickly forgotten but lost its importance over time. A year or 2 things were going great, just like how they were before the incident gave a new aspect to their relationship. Malvika and Rohit had met and things were happy between the two. Soon, Vidhya was on chatting terms with Rohit too. She had wrongly assumed that Malvika was cool with the arrangement since it was Malvika who had introduced her to Rohit. It was only later that she started noticing a few digs, a few meaningless taunts being targeted at her. At that time too Vidhya couldnt quite figure what was going on and assumed there was something wrong between Rohit and Malvika and left it at that.

Then came the blow. Hard, sudden and harsh. A lot of hurtful words were thrown at her. Most of them baseless. Her innocence and friendly nature had been taken for a ride. Malvika had blamed Vidhya for her failing relationship with Rohit. The distance between the two, her stubborness or his temper and her sensitivity didnt seem to strike as the reason. What had struck instead was the acquaintance Vidhya had with Rohit. Perhaps the only fault, if it could be called so at all, was that Vidhya had heard out Rohit's little tiffs with Malvika just as she had when the other told her about it and pointed out the other person's point of view. That is what Vidhya identified as her "fault".

That was it.

Vidhya was willing to work on it, talk about it. She wished to justify herself.Malvika hadnt given her the chance. In the angst of her failing relationship, Malvika hadn't realised that she had not only accused Vidhya of taking her boyfriend but had belittled their friendship and the opinion Vidhya had of Malvika.The accusation, in the light of it itself seemed harsh and the more Vidhya hurted over it, she began to see new aspects of their friendship she hadn't noticed earlier. Her blind trust in Malvika, her absolute concern. her confidence that come what may Malvika wouldnt get her wrong had all crashed. To reality or to nightmare, she didn't know.

3 years had since passed. Last year, Malvika had called up to wish for Vidhya's birthday after trying to contact Vidhya through various channels and finally tracing Vidhya's number through a mutual friend.The first few chats were awkward, abrupt. The wound was still sore for Vidhya, though it had begin to heal with the help of other friends. Their relationship had obviously changed but it still felt as though things could one day be how they were before. However the one thing that had changed for certain was Vidhya's ability to blindly trust and her understanding of relationships.She had made a vow then, 3 years ago that never again would she interfere in anyone's relationships unless they come outright and ask for help. Three years and the vow is still in place.Things weren't back to normal yet, definitely not but at least they were speaking again and here she was to meet the same person for the first time in flesh and blood after the war of words.

With one last sigh, Vidhya gulped the now cold tea and resumed staring at the doorway with the steady impatient tap of her foot giving the background score for the rush of thoughts in her head.

Once Upon a Time- Part 1

2009-07-08T08:57:00.000-07:00

"Damn! I'm late again. She is going to kill me." Malvika muttered to herself as she rushed to cross the road. There wasn't anything out of the ordinary about Malvika on first glance. She had the ability to blend into her surroundings, her petite structure helping her. She still had a 15 minute auto drive to reach the decided location and went about trying to find an auto who would come for the meter charge than multiples of the same.

Vidhya tucked her fringe behind her ear and waited at the corner table with a cup of tea scanning the crowd through the steam for the woman who was to be here 15 minutes ago. Clear, simple and sophisticated. That had to be the first things which struck anyone when they saw Vidhya. She stood out in the local crowd. It wasn't only her height; there was an aura around her that commanded respect.

It had been 3 years since they had met. Only a year since they had rekindled their friendship. A friendship which many wondered at. They were opposites- Malvika and Vidhya. Malvika was sensitive and unafraid of wearing her heart on her shoulders. Vidhya never let people see her anything but either cool,collected and cheerful or hot headed. Malvika needed to work hard to hit sixties in academics while Vidhya effortlessly touched the eighties. However Vidhya was the creative one between the two, far more expressive and romantic than what many assumed. Malvika was the cleverer of the two. She knew what one could do for her. Most people felt Malvika was the introvert and Vidhya was the extrovert. In reality, people knew as much about Vidhya as they knew about Malvika which was almost nothing.

Despite the huge number of friends and acquaintances, Vidhya shared her thoughts, feelings and worries with only her closest set of friends who were a group of 6.To these 6 people, Vidhya was extremely sensitive, supportive, warm, caring and at times vulnerable unlike the Vidhya the rest of the world saw at first glance. Of this 6, Malvika had been the closest. Hardly anything was left untold between the 2 of them. They knew each other inside out. At least, thats what Vidhya had believed until she found out to the contrary.

Needless to say, the shattering of the belief led to more than a few tears.

Mysore Mayhem- Part 9

2009-07-07T12:44:00.000-07:00

With the tumultuous trip behind me, I reached the doorstep of my home 7 hours later. All I wanted to do was give my parents the tightest hug I could before running up for a nice long relaxing warm shower following it with an equally long or perhaps longer chat with my parents. The very thought made me relax.

I rang the doorbell.
Once.
Twice.
Thrice.

Why couldn't they open the door?
I decided I should give them a call. Maybe there was a current cut and our UPS had failed as usual and hence the calling bell didnt ring.

I first called my mom. She always keeps her phone with her.
No response.

I tried my father's number and surprisingly it was switched off.
This is when I got nervous. When it rains,it pours. The difference being I love the rain but I definitely do not love whats happening now!

I banged the door as hard as I could.
Finally a response!

I could see the candle light but couldnt see through the fogged windows who it was opening the door.

When the door opened,I could feel the ground slip from under me.

The face above the candle wick was neither my father's nor my mother's.
It was that face.

My first and last and all the instincts in between ordered me to scream or faint or maybe pinch myself and figure its all a nightmare or that im hallucinating. Most probably I would have had I not heard my parents laughing and coming from behind him-whoever he was.

From relief and relaxation to fear to shock to confusion would probably best describe the change of emotions in the span of a few minutes.

I skipped the hugging bit of the plan and rushed to the shower. Clearly this person was well known to my parents. The chances of me knowing him but not recognising is also high. After a good twenty minutes in the shower with no answer, I walk down to dinner keeping my eyes trained on my mother who was beaming as usual.

“Recognise who this is?” My mom asks in her style of oh-i-know-you-know-the-answer-just-tell-me.
True. I felt like shooting her glares questioning if I knew, would I have freaked so much?

I guess the thought sort of leaked on to my face considering the smiles on their faces. My expression of bewilderment melted into a sheepish smile as realisation began to dawn.

The stranger was an old family friend of ours whom we hadnt met in over a decade.Thats all.
Not any murderer with motive.
Not a stalker
No one dangerous.

Just an old family friend whose face I had forgotten.

I guess that brought a lot of things to perspective except for the pillow pressing and silent escape. Unable to resist the temptation, the first minute I got out of my parent's earshot I questioned him about to come to know that it was indeed my cousins who were waking me up so lovingly and he had merely come to visit after coming to know from my parents that I was in Mysore but saw the sight and came to help them off me but then walked off later feeling it may not be the most appropriate way to say hi after a decade.

Pah! So much for nothing.

Sigh..How can I possibly wait till the next time I have a pillow fight with these lovable wicked rascals called cousins? ;)

Author's Note: This is the last part of Mysore Mayhem. Tune in pretty soon to read 'Once upon a time'

Mysore Mayhem- Part 8

2009-07-07T12:43:00.002-07:00

I looked up to press the floor only to have my frail finger be pushed into the button. I wish I hadn't turned to see who the brute was coz I saw that face again. The one of my discomfort, the cause of all the internal turmoil and mayhem in my mind was there,right in front of me. He mumbled a quick sorry before removing his finger off mine and walked out heading towards the tables where breakfast was served.

I was left in a state of shock,relief and confusion that I hadn't noticed the lift doors closing. I let myself go up again. A walk suddenly didnt seem all that tempting now.

The only thing which struck me was that I have to go home.NOW.
It didnt matter if there were still places I had to see or things I had to buy, I had to go home.

I waited till my aunt and uncle came back to the room. I sat quietly through their breaking down my cousin's marks,through their scrutiny of where he could have done better and how,through their comparison of his marks to his peers and cousins (sadly including me). When they finally started planning the trip for the next day, I raised my concern. I told them I wanted to go home. Only because I miss my parents. Nope. No way am I telling them Im psyched by a stranger. Finally after an hour of debating,phone calls and the likes I got a ticket to go back home.

Home sweet home. My haven. My heaven.

Mysore Mayhem- Part 7

2009-07-07T12:43:00.001-07:00

Fatigue soon took over and the night was spent in tired sleep.
The mayhem in my mind took no rest.

In fact, it worsened.

My plan for the day was to go shopping and perhaps visit Chamundi Hills. More than the shopping, I wanted to visit Chamundi Hills, not only for the climate but also for the deity there. It happened to be one of those few temples which struck a chord deep and I felt connected.

Instead I sat in the room all day long tending to a supposedly sick sister. I say supposedly because the kid who had severe stomach ache and diarrohea seemed perfectly fine the minute I took to volunteering to stay back and baby sit the kid.

The morning which should have been spent enjoying a breezy ride was spent sprawled on the extra bed thrown on the floor playing video games which were inbuilt with the TATA Sky unit. During a particularly dull game, the door unlocked itself. On instinct, I pulled the kid closer to me. I am used to staying alone and actually enjoy solitude but not in a hotel,no thank you. The knob opens slowly and oh-so-quietly and in walks with a forlorn look on the face- my cousin brother. It was only when I recognised the face and he had started his outburst of poor performance(which I thought was pretty good) in his tenth board exams did I release my breath.

To say I was somehow feeling shaken would be an understatement. I said a few words of encouragement to my bro before telling him to call me if they need anything while I go down for a walk.

With that self-promise of a walk which would clear the head, I waited for the lift and walked in, still staring at the sad plight of well worn slippers unaware that the minute I look up, Id be in for a rude shock.

Mysore Mayhem- Part 6

2009-07-07T12:42:00.000-07:00

The buffet breakfast is one of my all time favourites. As far as I have noticed, in any hotel, their breakfast is always the best may it be in terms of the spread or the quality of food. This was no exception either and Im sure I would have enjoyed it as much as I usually do if I didnt have a list of questions swirling madly in my mind.

From that moment in the morning, consciously or otherwise I had been searching for a person dressed in dark. Of course, added to the list of subjects were anyone who resembled the person but that wasnt of much help seeing I hadn't noted the face and most people here were built the same.

One of my techniques of dealing with stress/hyper-activity/depression etc is to walk. Luck so had it that that day's schedule had plenty of pleasurable walking involved. We visited Mysore Zoo and the famed Brindavan Gardens.

While there, I barely had time to think of any of the questions but on the way to and fro, the questions repeated themselves never yielding an answer or even a hint of an answer.

Except for one.
One face.
Nothing very clear yet it was a face.
One which I had noticed at the buffet breakfast, one which I had observed following in the zoo and one which I caught staring at me in the gardens.

Something was not falling into place and I didnt like it.

Mysore Mayhem- Part 5

2009-07-07T12:41:00.000-07:00

The next morning I awoke gasping for breath against the pillow being pressed onto my face. With the renewed strength from rested sleep I pushed the pillow off me and started a string of expletives aimed at my cousins only to see a much larger figure run out the window. It definitely wasnt my uncle but my gut instinct suggested I knew the person. I could have taken after him attempting to nab him and perhaps dramatically frame him in the lift or maybe race him down the stairs and miraculously catch him, throw him to the floor and peel off the mask (if he was wearing one) and gasp that it was in fact someone very close to me and stay in that shock till he runs off or slits my throat with a thin blade and then escape letting me rest in a pool of blood a few meters away from the buffet breakfast. Of course I could do all that if it were a movie or fiction but this is real. As real as you and I.

So I did the next logical thing which was to freshen up, trying to recollect the powerful dreams of the night to push the nightmare of the morning to the back of my mind. For every second of the dream remembered and cherished, the unknown dark figure pressing the pillow onto my face kept flashing for a while longer. As soon as I managed to get dressed hoping for the day's sight seeing to be pleasurable,i sat down with my cup of tea staring out the hotel window overlooking the Mysore Palace. The same palace which had reminded me of elegance and filled me with awe,in broad daylight looked as vulnerable as any ancient building (though im not sure if it can be called ancient!). What it did bring to my mind were questions relating to the morning. Was it attempted murder? If yes, why did he run when he could have finished me? Or did he realise that he was murdering the wrong person when I started gasping? But how could he not have realised it when he pressed the pillow to my face? If I settle it as attempted murder, why? I have no known enemies. How did he come in? Why hadnt he locked the door when he had come to do harm?

With so many questions, I left for the buffet breakfast tagging my younger sis along absent mindedly nodding to everything she said and ignorantly agreed to give her one of my favourite chains.

Mysore Mayhem- Part 4

2009-06-14T04:33:00.001-07:00

The trip to the Mysore Palace itself was a new experience for me. Something I most definitely wouldnt have done if I had gone to Mysore with my own parents. They would most probably freak to think their little princess walked the streets of an unknown city alongside a tonga carrying the others. It was hardly a fifteen minutes walk. Plus the best way to discover any city was to walk through it. Yet they (referring to my uncle and his family) wished to try something new. I would have jumped at the opportunity too but considering that Id have to live the rest of my life with the guilt of having contributed to the ill health of an already under-fed,over-worked horse, I opted out of it after clicking a few photos sitting in it.

I must confess though I had started walking with the intention of absorbing the city, my thoughts and sight were constantly on the tonga. One reason was not to lose way and the other one was imagining how life must have been when tongas were the fastest means of transportation. It had also struck me that possibly it wouldnt have been as difficult then because they hadnt known of the modern means of transportation we know now and the horses may have been better fed assuming the rich greenery described in every textbook to be true.

Once we reached the Palace in all its lit glory, I knew I was in love. Not just with the palace but with the energy surrounding it, the beauty enveloping it and the history. The energy was astounding as compared to the beauty or the history. Standing in front of the whole palace,the energy inserted images in my mind which I doubt Im capable of bringing to my mind otherwise. I could imagine the pretty girls draped in fine clothes and finer jewels glowing in their natural beauty and innocence run down the corridors. I could see the King in his majestic form and attire conduct his court. I could see the little kids run as if the palace was their world and there was none to stop them. I could envisage the fine furnishings seating the royals being a quiet witness to all the joys,the grief,the births, the deaths, the romances, the power and its rise and fall. I turned and instead of seeing the cement plane we were standing on, I imagined the dust roads, the overflowing greenery, the numerous servants. Startling to realise that the boundaries of the palace were in fact much bigger than they are today. To bring into one's understanding that this magnificent building was in reality, centuries ago home. Just like yours and mine. Only to a greater number of people.I agree there are grander palaces, forts etc in India but one cant deny this palace definitely makes its mark on memory. At least its impacted me, with all its over whelming energy.

That night, after a long time I had restful sleep despite it being filled with happy, revitalising, powerful dreams.

Mysore Mayhem- Part 3

2009-06-14T04:30:00.000-07:00

It was with much relief that I stepped onto the Mysore railway station.

Let me correct that.

I believed it would be with much relief that I would step onto the Mysore Railway Station.

Sigh. The minute I disembarked from the train luggage and all, I look up to see that our coach is at the farthest platform from the taxi stand. Ordinarily this wouldnt have been a problem but when im supposed to tag along the heavy luggage of a younger sis who seems to have packed more than I have in a carry luggage I had no choice but to grunt while I wheel both of our luggages till the taxi stand.

Finally we check into a posh suite.I didnt see the reasoning behind spending so much for something you wouldnt be enjoying. If you have come to a city for sight seeing why would you need a filthy expensive place to refresh yourself?I did attempt pointing it out to my uncle but looks like the man has more money than I thought to waste and in we went to the suite.

I stepped in and had to pause to absorb the beauty of the furniture. Im no trained eye in furnishings but I do know what pleases me and this definitely did. What I saw in front of me was a smartly lit room decorated in dark teak wood, engraved and embossed with metal and stones. Amazed I was. It took me a while to get a grip on myself, tear myself away from the many dreams I had started to daydream and proceed to refreshing myself to get started on the sight seeing starting off with the famous Mysore Palace.

I still managed to get ready before the others whom I doubt figured how enamouring the furniture was and how tasteful the lighting was (considering the way the little monkey was resting on the furniture, I seriously doubt it)

Aah..who am I to complain? After all, it all came breeeeeeeeeeeeeee :D

Mysore Mayhem- Part 2

2009-06-14T04:28:00.000-07:00

Finally the well known Hubli express comes jutting onto platform number 3 amidst the chaos of delayed announcements and reserved seat passengers scampering to get in first.

After a much dramatic yell from my uncle, I tug my luggage into the railway carriage to face the familiar stench of kid's vomit. Sigh. I guess I cant quite get away. With much strain I managed to throw my baggage onto its rightful place (on the overhead rack of the seat some 2 rows in front of me) and seated myself leaning onto the closed window.

Aah! I would have traded my seats with anyone that minute- well except for the ones right next to the puking kid. 2 plump women well into their forties but barely realising their age or size plomped onto the seats next to me taking a generous portion of my seat as well. I let a few minutes pass thinking they were settling down and once settled, they would shuffle and give me my space. Only once the train started moving and the aunties turned (how they managed in that space I dont know) shoving their generous bosoms up my face questioning me of my personal details did I realise that these “aunties” were indeed well settled and Id have to suffer the next few hours stuck with 2 sweaty aunties talking into my ear irrespective of whether I pretend to sleep or read the book I had carried along or even if I pretended deaf, I doubt if anything would have saved me of the experience.

By the time the train reached Mysore my identity as an undergrad student at a reputed university was lost and replaced by that of a 12th standard student at one of the most depressing colleges in a stream id never even considered.

Mysore Mayhem- Part 1

2009-06-14T04:16:00.000-07:00

A spur of a moment decision it was to hop along with my cousins as they went for their Mysore Trip. Of course the idea of an all expenses paid (minus shopping) didn't hurt either ;)

Thus, I left at 12pm Sunday for a 2 pm departing train. Something completely foreign to me. My habit has always been to leave an hour in advance which would give me ten minutes after traveling time. “More than sufficient” I used to tell my mom who used to get worried that we would miss the train and here I was standing at Platform 3 an hour in advance.

“Hello? Ma? (pause) Im going to Mysore.(pause) No, no its an official trip ma, I'll be back in a few days. (pause)” said a husky voice. With nothing else to do I turned to observe the drama unfolding. Very interesting “official trip” this young chap of roughly his mid-twenties was going to have with his arm around his- should I say secretary? ;)

Smiling to myself, I stretched once again to check if by any stroke of luck, the train had come early. WHACK! On my back my lil dahling of a cuz sis gave me on my back bringing me back to reality and once I was done glaring at her (I couldnt do much more to the pampered twerp) I scrambled to check for my own ticket and was delighted to find thanks to my last minute decision, I managed to get a window seat away from my cousins' family. I love their company I really do but I wouldnt complain of getting my personal time.

In any case, I loved train journeys right from when I was a kid. I never knew why and of course all through childhood I was too busy to wonder why and now as a young adult utterly jobless its not that difficult to sit and list out reasons why I do the smallest things I do ;)

Train journeys I believe spur in me an excitement of the unknown, a possibility im yet to encounter but a joy iv experienced several times over.

If only I knew what this journey had in store for me :)

My First Night

2009-06-04T00:14:00.000-07:00

BAM!BAM! WHAM!

Woohoo!!

Alright now, get your minds off the dirty track! That was me slamming a dozen or more cockroaches into the walls of my new house.

Iv shifted several houses till date but this must be one of the most memorable of the first nights in the new houses iv had. I can distinctly remember only 2 others- one where my brother and I (around 13 yrs)got the big comfortable leather sofas to rest the night and we ended up sleeping as though we are sharing the railway berth and the other was the first time I had a room all to myself (not to worry, as usual it was taken away from me asap) clean,neat,soft with a balcony and a barbie lollipop(C'mon! I was nine then)

After 6 long years iv finally had another memorable first night spent past midnight slamming cockroaches into the wall working out the (lack of) frustration built over the day spent with kids who made it a point to make quite a mess of me ;) Past midnight, the night was spent staring at the fan in the dark wondering what funny noises meant and whether there was any chance of the fan falling on my already injured leg and ofcourse, keeping alert in case of any more cockroaches who planned to share the bed with me :D

I must add though, with a little imagination even hitting cockroaches is fun :D

Navarasa

2009-05-10T20:37:00.001-07:00

Navarasa

Thats the title of the book Im yet to pen. Iv got the idea clear in my head, have a few scenes running in my head and most probably would start penning it from May 20th once my papers are done with.

The book if things work out as planned would have 12 stories-9 concentrating on the navarasas,2 on 2 other emotions which are used more often in literature and one grand finale in which I wish to incorporate all 11 emotions.

For the benefit of those who dont know the 11 emotions-

Sṛngāram (शृन्गारं) Beauty
Hāsyam (हास्यं) Laughter, Comedy
Karuṇam (करुणं) Compassion, Mercy
Raudram (रौद्रं) Fury
Vīram (वीरं) Pride, Heroism
Bhayānakam (भयानकं) Horror
Bībhatsam (बीभत्सं) Disgust
Adbhutam (अद्भुतं) Wonder
Śāntam (शान्तं) Tranquility, Peace

Vātsalya (वात्सल्य) Parental Love
Bhakti (भक्ति) Spiritual Devotion

Whats interesting here is to think that Iv hardly been writing stories for 4 years now during which I have managed 12 stories so far of which only 3 have seen the light of web while the other better ones met with sad demise into the dustbin or more dramatically thrown to fly with the gusty winds of the monsoon. Yet never did it till 2 months ago did it strike me to do a book. True, my best friend, all credit to her had been telling me, warning me even not to dispose of the stories, each of which have a very special place in my heart saying some day I could get to edit them and publish them as a book. Too bad I didn't listen. Then again, if I did listen, I wouldn't be myself would I? ;)

The timing of the idea striking is fantastic. As recounted in mind's eye-There I was sitting in the 2nd bench,left hand corner of the classroom in a seemingly boring e-commerce class (trust me even I have no clue how this specific teacher manages to make most pulsing topics dead) when the idea strikes hard. A few scenes start swimming in mind's eye and under the pretext of taking down notes, I jot down those few snippets and the excitement didnt quite die down for a week or more after that before I got buried under some other work to do which was challenging enough for the time being.

Now that Im almost done with my "other work" and am in need of a new tough challenge, I might as well start!

Just wondering though- How many would buy if I do manage to get it published? :D

To My Daughter

2009-05-21T00:07:00.000-07:00

A lil something I want to share. Its the stuff on the card my parents got me long ago :)It ranks first among the cards Iv got because everything it says has been true in my case. Love ya Ma!

Hope you enjoy the read.

To My Daughter, With Love, on the Important Things in Life

A mother tries to provide her daughter with insight
into the important things in life to make her life
as happy and fulfilling as possible

A mother tries to teach her daughter
to be good,always helpful to other people,
to be fair,always treating others equally
to have a positive attitude at all times
to always make things right when they are wrong
to know herself well
to know what her talents are
to set goals for herself
to not be afraid of working too hard to reach her goals

A mother tries to teach her daughter
to have many interests to pursue
to laugh and have fun every day
to appreciate the beauty of nature
to enter into friendships with good people
to honor their friendships and always be a true friend
to appreciate the importance of family
and to particularly respect and love the elders of the family
to use her intelligence at all times
to listen to her emotions
to adhere to her values

A mother tries to teach her daughter
to not be afraid to stick to her beliefs
to not follow the majority when the majority is wrong
to carefully plan a life for herself
to vigorously follow her chosen path
to enter into a relationship with someone worthy of herself
to love this person unconditionally with her body and mind
to share all that she has learned in life with this person

If I have provided you with an insight
into most of these things
then I have succeeded as a mother
in what I hoped to accomplish in raising you
If many of these things slipped by
while we were all so busy
I have a feeling that you know them anyway
One thing I am sure of, though
I have taught you to be proud of the fact
that you are a woman equal to all men and
I have loved you every second of your life
I have supported you at all times
and as a mother, as a person and as a friend
I will always continue to cherish and love
everything about you
my beautiful daughter.
__________________________________________Susan Polis Schutz

Life is or was?

2009-04-17T08:40:00.000-07:00

The cheery smile,
the twinkling eyes,
the active body,
with a happy heart
and a content soul
living a calm peaceful life

Now gives way,
Way to a hurried life
with a stressed heart
and a worried soul
mirrored by dull eyes
and mirthless smile
encompassed in a diseased body

Is this what life has become?
Or is this what we think it has become?

Promise

2009-04-15T02:33:00.000-07:00

A promise made in silence,
wrapped in trust, faith and hope
lies broken by a soft sword
opening vaults of deceit and suspicion

A promise born by love
and nurtured with devotion
lies buried by green eyes

A promise with none-
But one to care,
has breathed its last.

A silent farewell bids the heart,
praying a resurrection with-
" I promise."

A little something..

2009-04-17T08:37:00.000-07:00

A lil flowery piece which struck me during the day...nothing serious or anything..just

I lean back in my chair near the window; eyes closed listening to the fury of the rains. She like a mum to mother Earth pelts hard and fast with a vengeance, an indecorous bitter vengeance for bearing the trysts of the torts and injust silently. She lashes out her rage with no mercy, not even when she hears the skies roar in grief felt for Earth. Not for a sixtieth of a second does she rest, atleast not before she glances upon the Earth a couple of times with her sparkling eyes. For then she begins to wail, wail at her own misdeed and lets out a soul-piercing howl through the tiny crack in my window when the vicarious nature of her act fully descends upon her.

ENOUGH. I can tolerate no more. I stand pressed against the window letting the one warm tear run down my cheek hoping and praying for a remedy. I turn slowly to face the world outside questioning the silence to see her brother embracing her and sending his troubled exhausted sister in his cushioned chariot as he proceeds to smile wistfully clearing up the chaos caused by his sister’s wrath with warmth giving the Earth a second chance.

A second chance with hope

A second chance not to be missed.

Please.

You, I stand against.

2009-04-17T08:36:00.001-07:00

This little piece is not to be taken literally. It has a different meaning. the ocean here in fact, represents us, humanity.

I stand,
I stand drinking your beauty
But not surrendering to it.

I stand,
I stand against your lapping waves
But not falling prey to its power.

I stand,
I stand daring to go against you,
Your beauty, your power.
You, I plead to support me in my fight.

Suddenly

2009-04-17T08:34:00.001-07:00

Suddenly,
Good isn't good enough,
Being perfect isn't perfect,
And every right is a wrong.

Suddenly,
It's not the same anymore
All alone,
Every friend, a foe.

Suddenly,
I ask for love,
For friendship
To know none.

Suddenly,
My life seems to have changed
Only for me to realize,
It's I who have changed.

है कहीं वोह

2009-04-06T09:25:00.000-07:00

है कहीं वोह
जिसका मुझे इंतज़ार है
मालुम है की वोह आएगा
इन आसुओं को पोछने,
इस दिल को सम्बलने
इस जिस्म को जगाने
यकीन है मगर इरादा नही
फिर भी लगता है की हक है मुझे उसके यादों में मेरी दिन रात बिताने

जाने या जाने ना

2009-04-06T09:23:00.000-07:00

ना जाने क्यूँ कोई चुपकेसे घुस जाते हमारी ज़िन्दगी में

ना जाने कैसे दूर हो कर भी पास लगने लगते हैं

ना जाने कब मगर मंज़ूर है की हमको उससे है इकरार

एक बार

2009-04-06T09:20:00.000-07:00

एक बार नज़रें पड़ी
और येह सास बेहेकने लगी

एक बार छु आ
और येह दिल धड़कने लगा

एक बार आँखें कूली
और यकीन हुआ की येह सच नही, सपना था

Adolescence as I realised it to be..

2009-03-22T00:21:00.000-07:00

Another poem Im fond of for the meaning and the thoughts which went into it.

As a child,
Bun with tea is nice,
Mama’s cooing is joy
And dependence makes no difference.
As a child,
LIFE’S A FAIRYTALE.

As an adult,
Everything changes.
Its no longer bun with tea
But peace which is nice
Mama’a cooing becomes a
Silent prod of incompetence.
And independence is essential.
As an adult
LIFE’S A BATTLEGROUND

Have I changed? Or
Have circumstances changed?
Whatever it may be,
The difference has, is and will be.

2009-03-21T23:04:00.000-07:00

This is one poem Im pretty proud of. I love it more so because a lot of ppl thought i was in a relationship which broke up and that this poem is a result of the "heartache". That could only be as far from the truth as possible :) The truth is its something which struck me one night when I was struggling to sleep and the minute I penned it I could drift back into peaceful sleep :)The magic of Muse :) (for those who don't know, Muse is the greek goddess for poetry,literature and arts)

I’M SORRY

How I feel,
What I know,
Makes no sense,
When I’m with you

I don’t understand,
Nor do I try.
I waited for you
Believing you to be true

Before you came,
Life was complete.
Now, you are gone,
And life’s more than complete,
It’s over.

I fear to do what is right,
I fear to fall in love,
But I know I’d have to.
I’M SORRY